Originally posted on Multiple Sclerosis News Today
My mom always wished for a son and a daughter. Ten years after I was born, her dream became a reality with the arrival of my baby brother, Michael. Because I was the only child for so long, I had never considered becoming a big sister, nor did I understand what that truly meant.
When my brother was born, my mom wondered what kind of relationship he and I would have, given the large age gap. She worried that we wouldn’t get along or that we’d resent each other. After some time, it became clear that there was nothing to worry about. Michael is my best friend and a profoundly significant person in my life.
I was a high school senior when I was diagnosed with relapsing-remitting multiple sclerosis (RRMS), but I experienced my first episode of optic neuritis at 14 years old. During my initial neurological occurrence, my brother was only 3 years old, and when I received my diagnosis, he was 7.
Amid such difficult and uncertain times, we chose not to inform Michael about my health because he was too young to fully understand multiple sclerosis. But we knew we’d eventually have to tell him.
Michael Lama Jr. (left) and Desiree Lama (right) at her graduation. (Photo taken by Manuela Lama)
Walk MS 2017
Shortly after my diagnosis, I searched online for MS fundraisers and events that my family could participate in, and I came across a walking fundraiser organized by the National Multiple Sclerosis Society. My mom and I gathered my brother and a few of my close friends, and prepared to participate in Walk MS 2017, held at Texas A&M University-San Antonio.
At this point, my mom and I still hadn’t told Michael about my diagnosis, so he was confused as to why we were participating in Walk MS. I no longer wanted to keep him in the dark, so we told him right then and there.
Keep in mind that he was only 7 years old, so there was only so much we could explain. This was a little boy who called me “sissy,” because he couldn’t say “sister” when he was younger.
My mom pulled him to the side, and all she said was, “Sissy is sick, and she will always be sick.” In an instant, tears were flowing down his face.
Setting an example
Being a big sister to Michael is one of my greatest accomplishments, but he has taught me so much more than I’ve taught him. Since we told him about my health, he has always been extremely patient, kind, and understanding, even on my darkest days.
On the days when my mood shifts toward darkness and irritability, he is there with his comedic tendencies. Through all the ups and downs our little family has encountered, he has grown into an amazing young man. For me, that is the biggest silver lining of living with MS.
Even though he’s almost a decade younger than me, Michael is one of my biggest role models.
